This blog is part of a series, if you haven’t read How My Wife Survived Cardiac Arrest, read it first and this post will make a whole lot more sense.
The Darkest Night
The most grueling part of this whole ordeal was the time spent in the hospital while my wife was in a coma. The doctors told us she would need to be in an induced coma for three days, and her body kept at a chilling 90 degrees.
Then we will see if she wakes up. All of the doctors kept trying to prepare me for the worst.
“She may not wake up.”
“She may have limited brain function.”
“She might be in a vegetable state when we bring her out of the coma.”
The first night in the hospital all of this was running through my mind. I couldn’t sleep. Anytime I closed my eyes, I would see my wife collapsing on stage with bright red blood coming out of her mouth. Yet when I opened them I saw the reality of the situation, my wife in a coma.
Fighting For Faith
That night I began to experience so much doubt and fear. Before arriving at the hospital I was certain Micah was going to make it after all she had just been raised from the dead!
The doubt came in waves. I thought a lot about the chances of Micah dying, and what my response would be to the Lord. Then I began to pray, and the Lord revived my faith. It became real to me at that moment.
Prayer can alter the course of future events.”
Then I began to worship with the little faith that I had, someone had texted me a song called “Lily’s Song” by Kristene Dimarco. The chorus says, “I will not die, I will live, and I will tell of the works of the Lord and sing of His wonder.” The song ignited a flame in me, and I kept it on repeat, singing and declaring over Micah, you will not die, you will live! All night, I did not stop, even when the nurses came in.
Will God heal? Yes! But what if nobody persistently asks? (Psalm 50:15, Isaiah 58:9, Matthew 21:22) It is interesting the type of language associated with prayer in Scripture. Wrestling. Persistence. Seeking. Asking. Knocking. When was the last time you wrestled with the Lord in prayer?
You Are Not Alone
That first night in the hospital I felt alone, but in hindsight, I know there were so many people praying for Micah. I often joke with her that she started an improvised national prayer movement! In those dark moments, the feeling of loneliness can be so real, but know that Jesus is interceding with the Father on your behalf (Hebrews 7:25), and you never know who else is interceding on your behalf.
Today, I still run into people who tell me they were fervently praying for Micah. The day of the incident I had called every pastor in my contacts and asked them to pray. Many of them stopped their Sunday services to pray for Micah, what a blessing!
When You Don’t Have Words
In traumatic situations, you might not have the words to pray, but you can always pray in the Spirit. (Romans 8:26-27) Some people are easily put off by speaking/praying in tongues, misunderstand it, and some are just weirded out by it. Don’t be! It’s a powerful way for you to connect with God, especially when you don’t have words, He knows your heart.
After that dark night, by faith, I knew the Lord was going to heal Micah.
…man has it in his power by prayer to move God to work in His own way among men, in which way He would not work if prayer was not made. – E.M Bounds
